2002-12-13 || 1:49 p.m.

|| predictions for the year ought three. ||

it works this way with every calendar all tattered and marked up with red lined boxes and secret codes and reminders and birthdays and scratch marks. i'm down to one page representing the month of december and getting anxious. 2002 to 2 0 0 three. plans so far: *smoke-free in 2003 (my new mantra while sitting alone on the front porch, barefoot, late at night, bundled up in grammy's blankets and feeling like a one-hundred year old crotchety old maid, inhale exhale inhale exhale whispering to the oak trees and ducking whenever anyone walks by). *switching the coffee for the tea. allowing black tea to change my life. allowing the mass consumption of tea to change my entire image: oh, she's the girl who drinks the tea. *going back to the short hair because this pseudo-cactus flower-era goldie hawn hairdo is not cutting it without mass amounts of aqua net and hot rollers. and even goldie hawn would look silly with said -era hairdo whilst wearing the old man pants and soggy parka. *banishment of the wallflowery tendencies, i.e. looking boys in the eye. *getting over whatever it is that is keeping me from going out properly (ps i am sorry, sweet helen jane and company, for letting the mean reds and general fucked-upness from keeping me from your crafty oasis.). *wearing more new shoes because although these lovies have been with me since junior-year of high school (!) and know it all, it is time. *editing the hell out of my novel. *publishing my impeccably wondrous novel. *getting on fresh air with teri gross to discuss my Hit Novel and all-around righteousness and finding beck just happens to be the other guest star. starting my new life with my beau beck. convincing him to ditch this new shit and go back to the perfection that is one foot in the grave. *getting way into that exercise thing. *finding that inexplicably i was indeed put on this earth to be a tap-dancing burlesque dancer, and going for it, dudes. *taking more wondrous trips to faraway places. new york! france! vancouver! london! bingo at cache creek casino! yes! *finding my purpose in life and sticking to it.

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