2003-05-30 || 3:38 p.m.

|| oh for the love of my aunt mary. ||

dear "the red,"

i caught you looking at me for 1.27 seconds today. the plan was to look back so our eyes could properly lock and our righteous love affair could begin, but i just couldn't do it. i am terribly afraid all signals thus far point to my being not interested, but oh, dear red, i assure you my love and admiration run deep. and i really like your socks. and i can't help having spectacularly dirty thoughts whenever you eat various pieces of fruit.

tell me your name is arthur and the world, or at least this block of telegraph, is ours.

with all sincerity and fifteen-minute breaks,

that girl across the street who's always with that tall boy but he's just a friend, really; he's dating my good friend tania.

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