2004-04-10 || 9:08 p.m.

|| swallowing something very hard and pretending it's not stuck in my stomach. ||

some things are very simple and some things are very complicated.

i handed over a ten-dollar bill to the taxi driver this evening knowing full well it was too much but unsure how tipping goes in these situations. i walked down my street holding a suitcase and thrift town shopping bag (inside the dreamiest yellow old lady coat, like my own but waist length. had revelation at t. town today: stop fighting the old lady inclinations. i picked up all the clothes i would have picked at age twenty (height of serious old lady fashion) and bought them all. i eyed the girls trying on the pointy high heels and picked up my polyester and checked out. i am locked in my personal fashion era. i am going to stop worrying about the amount of black i am wearing when at bars and the compulsory levi's/high heel combo. fuck it. i have a tissue tucked in my sleeve and i smell like thrift store and i am wearing yellow. this is the way it's gotta be. xo.).

i notice lately i have been kind of faking it.

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