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2004-06-14 || 1:56 p.m. || devil, thy name is directv || we got cable. you know how there are people who can bake a batch of cookies and place said cookies on a plate on the counter and maybe eat one and then walk away and go gardening or jogging or filing bills and tax forms? and then there are people who bake cookies, eat half the cookie dough, put the remaining nine cookies on a plate on the counter and then proceed to eat them all in roughly two hours? cookies are my cable. cookies are my cookies, too, but i have found that the more sinister qualities of cookies are found in cable. i haven't lived in a house with cable in nine years, unless you count the nine-month stint in the oakland house where roommate seth would watch the movie selena on spanish HBO and cry every time. my parents have cable. when i visit them i feel lasers shoot out of the television screen like tractor beams to my brain and force me to sit on the couch and drool a lot. because i like cable. i love the makeover shows and the cooking shows and the movies i forgot i hadn't seen and mtv in all its soul-suckingness. but this weekend, a breakdown: 3 hours of jessica simpson & nick l newlyweds, and i really hate j.s. so very much. and the thing is since it's all a crazy overwhelming choose-your-own visual adventure, this cable tv, i can't feel satisfied with any one thing. i am constantly scanning the 100+ other channels in the event i am missing something. like e! true hollywood stories. and whatever the reason behind that show devoting a half hour to anna nicole's weight. last night brian and becky got home and found me on the couch, panic-stricken. i told them i couldn't stop watching. i couldn't even turn the tv off. and i had no idea what was on really, or what i wanted to watch. i didn't want to watch anything, but i couldn't turn my head or venture more than twenty-feet from the screen. i am very nervous about the situation. guestbook || notes || archives || profile || photos || d-land |