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2002-06-14 || 11:21 a.m. || melatonin mishap, wheeee. || i have not been able to sleep all week. not properly. not the usual hello pillow conk out. instead it is toss turn watch elimidate talk to the cat take half a vicadin have bad dreams wake up dry heaving. lovely. but. i haven't had nightmares in a long time and this week it has been nightmare film festival hosted by my head. (this is where i catalogue a few of the more memorable ones. sorry.) *kellymysis and i get into a fight and she decides to get back at me by joining ranks with osama bin laden. i look out the window and see a helicopter and there in the wee window is osama's beard so i know she means it. we then get into a fight over how she cannot possibly meet mr bin laden in a teeshirt and underwear (that's what she sleeps in). the bad guys show up with sticks of dynamite, take over our bathroom as their secret hide-out, and blow me up and take my sister away. *various ghost dreams, i think because i am afraid the new house will be haunted.. last night there was a ghost behind the curtains and when the wind would blow a certain way i could make out a ghosty outline. then the ghost grabbed my foot and i couldn't get away and i woke up to meow meow chewing on my toe. errr. textbook anxiety dreams i guess. i've gotten into the habit of getting home and sitting on my bed and looking at everything. every thing. books and knick knacks and framed pictures of my mother. suitcases and typewriters and records and three years worth of bills (do you need to keep bills? telephone and electric and all that? i would throw them away, but i also don't like the idea of my name printed on pages and pages floating in space.). how do i cram this apartment into a very small room? i haven't started packing. tomorrow tomorrow. let's start tomorrow. guestbook || notes || archives || profile || photos || d-land |