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2002-09-18 || 2:49 p.m. || heart attack: black white and read all over || you come to the realization that your heart could and most likely will break a thousand times. over stupid stuff. like finding out your ex-boyfriend, one who has never really played ex-boyfriend very well (how that e-x dissolves so easily..), is. well. dating. d-a-t-i-n-g. and you don't even know if it's fair to call it that, in big bold gerund form, but all you do know is he went on at least one date. and you know this because you read an effing article he wrote in the newspaper about it. and this was an article he was excited for you to read. and he has never mentioned the fact he was. well. d-a-t-i-n-g at all, even though you have mentioned a few episodes to him. he never said, not even while you're at his apartment acting completely inappropriately (where is that e-x?) on a saturday afternoon, that he is seeing people. because he has every right to see people. that's not the point. it's just that. you weren't planning on such a visceral reaction to one printed sentence. that took you completely by surprise (its content and your reaction.). and. you shot off a very small meek email, something to the effect of Date: Wed, 18 Sep 2002 14:41:41 -0700 (PDT) From: From the Desk of Jenny Apple" Subject: heart attack. To: innocent bystander i was reading your article online. could not get past the 'i was on a date in the mission.' will try again later. (you should warn me of such things. the heart-race panic attack is something one should be ready for.) * * * * * * * and. you're shaking it off, shaking it off. but. ouch.
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