|
2004-12-15 || 12:24 p.m. || brian: "is he s or g? i can't tell with these oakland boys." || i have a theoretical crush on this boy whom i always change my mind about when i see him in person. last night from the other end of the bar (for some reason i spent a lot of my time with my head bent close to the counter. did you notice that, brian? i distinctly remember black chipped paint and the way the christmas lights reflected off the surface and how nice it felt to rest my forehead on the edge when i was laughing at something secret) i realized he is the walking conglomeration of several boys i've dated, kind of like the product of a science experiment i devised once when very drunk and lonely and in need of serious kissing: glasses beard hat smile hands sweater tattoo baby fat. in a very self-centered way it made me feel like doctor frankenstein and i pretended to possess some sort of force over him so that when we accidentally made eye contact and held it for too long he knew exactly how i like my hand held and name spoken and why all those parts alone didn't quite work right but maybe all together in cooperation but maybe not. guestbook || notes || archives || profile || photos || d-land |